I don’t eat insects, not knowingly anyway. There are other more delicious ways to get protein, like eating shad roe and cow tongue. Liver and onions is good, but one man’s meat is another man’s poisoned apple. In short, I’ll eat almost anything that won’t make me sick at just the thought of it. I like buffalo. Is that legal now that it’s our national mammal? I also like alligator, snake, squirrel, venison, rabbit, eel and all kinds of fish. I watch Andrew Zimmern on Bizarre Foods and am amazed that he eats giant grubs and worms. I’ve never eaten a grub and I haven’t eaten a worm since I was a year old and don’t plan to take up the delicacy again any time soon. I remember the first lobster I

Who is that skulking outside America’s public restrooms and locker rooms? Why, it’s President Obama handing another issue to the Republicans to use against the Democrats in the fall election. And just to keep this in perspective, according to the New York Times, there are .01 percent to 0.3 percent transgender people In this fucked up, batshit crazy country we live in. Taking a leak or a post-game shower has become political and Obama is not helping. And let’s face it, bathrooms are one place where anyone can easily hide their gender, but a locker room is entirely a different matter. I’ll confess I hate public locker rooms. Stripping down in front of a bunch of strange men is not my idea of

Don’t ever think we the peeps can’t get more absurd. Fear, 24-7 news and social media fuels our absurdity. The most mundane, silly so-called “news story” can be blown out of proportion if it’s accompanied by hysterical rantings online and in video. It doesn’t even have to be dramatic video. It just has to be a moving image on your TV, computer or phone. And of course, if that “news story” generates fear, the nearest politician will jump on it and use it to elbow his way to the front of the mob. Modern politics are all about prejudice. People aren’t listening, reading, researching, or spending any time examining the truth. It’s easier to join the Republican Party, Tea Party or the Democratic

I took a Trump Dump yesterday. That’s right, I extruded from my economy a person I’ve been doing business with for years because he and his friends have the same attitude as Trump. In the past, I’d tolerate him and laugh behind his back at his absurdity but did business with him because of his skills. Not anymore. I came to realize on this bright, warm spring day that that kind of tolerance has given rise to Trump and his Republican minions. I took my money to one of his competitors instead. I’m certain that the majority of American voters will take a Trump Dump in the fall, but the movement has to go beyond politics. It has to involve businesses owned by people who nurture the hatred that i

To all you mothers, stepmothers, mothers who were former dads but still have the dad parts and dads who were once moms but still have some lady parts and moms who were dads but went all the way to addition by subtraction and dads who were moms who went under the knife and grew a pair.

This would be a pairing made In hell. We would get to hear twice as much hatred, anger, rage, paranoia and just plane bullshit, and that would be from the left. Forget about the right-wingers. They would vent and roar and hate until they mentally collapsed. In the end, we’d have a bunch of exhausted conservatives who would have to rest for the next four years. Of course the Democrats would win. That’s a given. Maybe they could get something done, like control the House, Senate and put a liberal on the Supreme Court. Maybe they could enact meaningful gun control.

I decided that “jerk” was more appropriate than “asshole.” Assholes are open to redemption, but jerks are jerks forever. They can’t change because they feel they don’t have to, that how they are is the way they want to be. Assholes, on the other hand, see the light eventually and, if not change their behavior, they at least see the error of their ways. An asshole is capable of apologizing but a jerk never will, or if he tries, it will come off as hollow and insincere because he doesn’t really mean it. Why? Because a jerk always right. Trump admits it; he’s always right. He said so. He’s a jerk of the first order, which brings me to another point. George W. Bush was our first Dumbass Presiden